Gratitude in 2020
The very idea has been missing from my consciousness — a lot.
Gratitude 2020 — gratitude in a pandemic — can change everything about each moment of each day.
I know this: When you’re presenced in gratitude — appreciation and allowance — the pain of what you don’t have and what you’ve lost softens enough for you take full breaths and be at peace.
Fierce gratitude can look like this:
I’m grateful for the sh*t mood I’ve been in and out of (a lot of in) the last few days. Really.
I’ve been struggling with the upcoming holiday and the fact that I’ll be on my own that day, in a pod of one.
I’m usually at my sister’s, or a friend’s. And I’m the designated carver. Which allows me to nibble the succulent fatty bits as I go. By the time the meal is served, I’ve usually had my fill of turkey. 🙃
The 2020 social playbook.
New rules, staying safe, caring for others — it’s all looking different.
2020. This year, I’m not carving my sister’s turkey or hanging with the usual crew in the kitchen.
She’s not even making a bird and inviting me to carve. No one’s inviting me to their household pod, and I wouldn’t go. Cooking an entire turkey for myself just to eat the fatty bits is a non-starter and my housemate’s working that day. So I’ve been glum.
Today two ideas occurred to me as I had my hands in the paint, and I acted on them both.
First I followed an idea, and google showed me that my favorite part of the turkey (the tush, as my grandma called it) is something I can buy. Of course I had to find out what butchers call it: turkey butt or tail. I just ordered some for myself and I’m gonna grill them and all of a sudden I’m really excited about my Thanksgiving plans, food wise.
Then I reached out to a couple of friends, suggesting a food swap and walk on Thanksgiving Day. Got a Yes right away.
Right after this happened, my housemate invited me to do an early Thanksgiving meal with her and her partner the night before, and guess what? — I get to carve! Woot!
Funny to see myself move through my crap mood, as I am, and watch new, lighter, love-ier ideas come through. And act on them. And receive a surprising and delightful invitation.
Gratitude. Allowance. Acceptance.
To sum up. I’m grateful:
- I was in a sh*tty mood but I didn’t grab the napalm and make things worse. Despite the glum AF moments of feeling sorry for myself, I wasn’t compelled to lash out or manipulate.
- I followed that inner light even when I didn’t know it was there. Lots of rest, waking up and painting first (even before making my tea!), and allowing that crap mood to move in me (even when I didn’t know that it’d ever move through and out).
- I heard the inner new ideas as they came, and I listened. Entertaining the idea that there might in fact be good options shifted everything.
- I asked for what I wanted. This might be the biggest shift — wanting my unspoken needs to be anticipated and met and resenting you for failing me no longer has much appeal. Woot!
So I’m grateful, even for the black cloud of gloom and every glimmer of light in the darkness.
In this fiercely grateful spirit, I’m doing a thing.
I’m hosting Simplici-Tea, a Gratitude Gathering.
Thanksgiving day itself. 10:30 am Pacific. $18.
Come exactly as you are. Bring a your favorite warm beverage. Get comfortable, really. I may be in my jammies (these days, who can tell the difference?).
We’ll talk. We’ll go deep. We’ll laugh. Cards may be pulled. Appreciation and gratitude spoken and witnessed. Vision and intentions named.
Bring your grateful heart. Even in pandemic isolation, there’s so much to be grateful for. Including freaking turkey tushies!