I asked to be guided, and I was…

The power of affirmative thinking works a lot better without reservations or conditions

Makes it entirely different from kinda, sorta, conditional affirmative thinking

I prayed to be guided, and I was...

Even though I teach this stuff, and even though I understand it completely in theory, until just recently in this adventure of having to move and finding my new home I didn’t see the disconnect between what I know intellectually and how I was behaving. Which in moments of uncertainty (uh, which were pretty much all of my waking moments) found me behaving like an out-of-control ball of stress and fear. Pretty. Not.

  • Fear and stress leaking out of my pores; I bet you could smell it; for sure you could see it.
  • Fear and stress negatively impacting my work with my clients and my work on my business (distracted much?).
  • Fear and stress compromising my health, which is no great shakes to begin with.
  • Fear and stress affecting my looks (sleeplessness and nervous cuticle attacks make me so attractive!).
  • Fear and stress being bigger than my peace and happiness (to the point of being convinced can’t be peaceful or happy).

Yo, that was all choice. I know!

I chose to do what I know how to choose, because of course. There’s some kind of comfort for me in my habitual dark side. Instead of operating from knowing knowing knowing that I’m being guided — fear and stress come way too easily to me. In the process of learning to be a spiritual, brave, of-service woman, I have shed lots of resistance (and clearly have many more layers to go). I learned how to affirm my prayers, to ask to be guided. But in the face of uncertainty, spiritual certainty drops away and I lose my grip on the good. Oh Fear! I know you, I know how to hang out with you. So I choose to ignore/forget any affirmation, which immediately causes me to drop my connection to the Divine, and instead I walk around fanning the flames of my negative scenario of the moment.  I have plenty of them!

What was different this time

This time, I tried something new. In addition to saying and singing and painting and praying my affirmation daily, and more than once a day:

My perfect house at my perfect price at the perfect time is already chosen and ready for me now. All I need to do is keep walking in its direction.

In addition, I also started compassionately handling my fear and stress. It would still come in. Of course. But instead of freaking out (I’m not supposed to be fearful any more!), which only makes it bigger, or diving into that old dark and grimy neighborhood — the intersection of Stress and Fear — at the expense of everything (see those bullets above), I would welcome them, give them an imaginary little pat, thank them, and then gently move them out of the way so I could keep moving in the direction of my house.

From the time I started this combined method, it was less than 14 days until I was led to my new house and signed the lease. Just sayin’…

Peaceful, and quiet!

Which is awesome!

  • It’s right on the Bay Trail in Point Richmond — as in 20 feet from my door. Which although connected, is a much cleaner and quieter Bay Trail than the one I walk 13 miles south in my current neighborhood. It’s gorgeous.
  • The house has every feature on my wish list. Dishwasher. Washer/dryer. Gas stove. Wood (okay fake wood) floors).
  • It’s nearly 1,800 square feet. Plenty of room for me and my housemate and room for privacy.
  • It has vaulted ceilings so there’s plenty of light and air.
  • It’s about $500 per month less than comparable rentals right now. A bargain!

There are some things I don’t like. It’s not perfect.

  • The fake wood floors. But at least there’s no carpet.
  • It’s a development. All the houses look alike. I can’t decorate the front at all.
  • And there are what’s called HOA rules. Can’t do this. Can’t do that.
  • It’s far away from much of my life, far enough up a too often traffic-choked freeway to make me have to get creative about back roads and scheduling.
  • It’s not very diverse.

But hey, I could use the quiet and the beauty after 8.5 years of living in a very gritty edgy and unsafe neighborhood.

The lease was signed last night. I move in six weeks or (gulp!) less. The to-do list is already quite long and growing by the minute. I begin packing next week.

Now to come up with an affirmative prayer for this move!

Suggestions anyone? How have you done this big life change in a short timeframe and retained your sanity? Talk to me in the comments. Blessed be.

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The qualities that allow me to move through moving…



I’m a barely tamed hippie, sage, seasoned, sarcastic (not all the time any more, but still). I’m a mom, a daughter, sister, a neighbor, and a friend. I’ve been on this meandering journey — like you, probably — seeking a better connection to and experience of peace, harmony, and fun in every bit of life. I’m single, quite good at it, and mostly love it. I’m here for the conversations I get to have with you, which these days center on exploring the mystery and beauty of life, work, health, aging, and creative expression. Want to know a little more about me and my journey? Explore the site. Read the blog. Connect with me on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Pinterest, and LinkedIn.

Join the conversation!

  1. So glad that it worked out for you! Your new place sounds amazing. Yep, I do fall into the fear and stress pits even thought I know better. Thank you for sharing this wonderful story and important reminder of the power of positive affirmation. Stay blessed <3

    • Jodi, Oh thank you for saying it looks amazing! I feel blessed. And have now fully shifted into packing mode. What that looks like in my neighborhood: Carried a throw rug that I no longer want on my walk this morning and gave it to a homeless woman.

      Blessed be to you too!

    • Andrea, welcome here! Yup, that little tiny amygdala can get so loud! That’s why I need to keep up the prayer, meditation, and affirmation.

      In gratitude,

        • Melabia, welcome here. You ask a great question.

          The amygdala is the little part of our primitive brain and its job is to keep us safe, and warn us of danger. Really good when a wild animal is coming at you; not so good when the fear response becomes habit and you hear “danger! danger!” all the time.

          As one of my spiritual neuroscience teacher says (ellipses mine),

          “The alarm bell of your brain — the amygdala[…] — uses about two-thirds of its neurons to look for bad news: it’s primed to go negative. Once it sounds the alarm, negative events and experiences get quickly stored in memory — in contrast to positive events and experiences, which usually need to be held in awareness for a dozen or more seconds to transfer from short-term memory buffers to long-term storage.

          In effect,[…] the brain is like Velcro for negative experiences but Teflon for positive ones. That’s why researchers have found that animals, including humans, generally learn faster from pain (alas) than pleasure.”

          I recommend his book Buddha’s Brain and you can read more of this article I’m quoting here.

          Blessings to you!

    • Molly, it’s lovely to see you here. Welcome. Yup, the Outback is my only reference in Point Richmond. So far, anyway. And I love that store.


  2. <3 CONGRATULATIONS <3 You've manifested a beauty! I'm so happy for you 🙂
    As someone who lives in an area with HOA rules and regs, I totally understand. I just look to gratitude at being in a beautiful location with a wonderful natural background! And having the presence of water brings peace and an abundance of wildlife – your new locale looks just as utterly amazing… enjoy!

    • Tracy, welcome, and thank you! I really needed to hear from someone who is loving her place despite HOA rules. That just increased my level of ease, and I am very grateful.

      Love and light,

  3. Love stories of desires being delivered.
    An affirmation for your move? Perhaps “It is easy and fun to arrange my new life.” Enjoy the peace and calm of the water!

    • Angela, welcome; thanks for stopping by. I love it. It is easy and fun to arrange my new life. Yup!


  4. Woo hoo! That makes you closer to me! And one of the most awesome little sandwich shops right off the Bay Trail…Can’t wait to introduce you to it!

    • Tess, hi! Now if I only ate sandwiches! 🙂 But closer to you makes getting together easier, yay for that.


  5. Beautiful & serene…..Congratulations. Special Thank U for reminders re ‘asking for and allowing guidance’ & for sharing your compassionate yet firm handling of the twins S & F.

    in love & gratitude

    • Yollana, thank you so much! Funny, you are thinking about moving closer to the city action and here I am moving a bit away.

      Love and light,

  6. Sue, this is absolutely beautiful! I am envious of your view. Thank you for the reminder to keep saying those affirmations religiously…not just when I remember to! I know they work…I was guided to my perfect mate 18 months ago & started manifesting goodness into my life after a very dark period. I too get caught up in fear.

    • Stacy, Ooh, guided to a mate? Now that sounds juicy, and after this experience, probably do-able! Wonder if I can affirm an ease-full move and a fabulous mate at the same time? Think the Goddess can handle two at once?


  7. Sue I am SO happy for you! I read through your pro and con list and I think the pros far outweigh the cons. The important thing is you must be feeling tremendous relief at this point and you deserve to take some quality ‘me’ time girlfriend!

    • Marquita, you’re right. And those pergo floors are gonna be so easy to keep clean! 🙂

      Quality “me time”? What? Don’t I have to pack? Now? Jeeze. Gonna get some quality “me time” ASAP. Thank you.

  8. It looks so beautiful, with lots of space and light and great walks. In the end, you practised what you teach, and now you will teach it with even more confidence!

    • Juliet, I was just thinking about what sunset watching will be like, wow. And thanks for the blessing about how I teach; you’re totally right.

      Love and gratitude,

  9. Congrats Sue I am happy for you. and i relate to so much of what you don’t like as we also live in what we call here a complex where everything looks the same and there are rules. We can walk to the beach , it is closer to some things and like you it was a lower rent and I can see the sky from my desk. That view is awesome- I see you move as being a clearing for you
    big hugs
    Suzie xx

    • Wow, Suzie, that’s great to read; thanks so so much for sharing it with me. You do not appear to be stifled in any way by living in a place of lookalike houses. I feel better already!


  10. So happy for you, Sue! And what beautiful practices to carry you along your path to your perfect house for now. I love the practice of treating fear and stress with tender witnessing. So powerful…particularly when combined with Heart-directed movement toward where we want to go and be. Thank you for sharing this journey in your posts!

    • Dana, thank you. Being tender to fear and stress is not easy, but the payoff is huge.

      Next up: the packing, releasing, and moving journey!

      Love and light,

  11. Congrats Sue 🙂
    Really appreciating the wisdom of attending to BOTH the affirmation & the stress levels.
    And the affirmation for the next step? Well, last time I moved I said something like, “I am so grateful to make this move with easy and joy.” Have to say that when it wasn’t easy or joyful, being reminded of the affirmation made me laugh and take it all more lightly.
    I look forward to hearing what you use as an affirmation – this area of expertise if clearly your realm.

    • Amy, so far I’m affirming: My packing and moving and settling in proceed with ease and grace and, wrapped in the love and safety of the Divine, I rest in the knowing that I don’t have to do everything today.

      How’s that sound?


  12. Sue, this is wonderful! It’s inspiring to witness your spiritual practice in action – Point Richmond is a great little town, and there you’ll be, Goddess blessed.

    Love from Gigi

  13. So wonderful to hear of this marvelous transition. May your home be blessed with peace and joy, comfort and safety, sweet moments of solitude and enriching moments of hospitality.

    • Jaina Bee, so nice to see you here! Welcome. And thank you for this beautiful blessing.

      Love and magic,

  14. Thank you for sharing your unfolding. In my latest move (where I had only been 2 years) and had less than 2 months to pack and move, I called in an amazing amount of help and support with ease, and gave away ALOT! Still exhausting. I’m enjoying the freedom on being home free for a few months, going deep into “what makes my heart sing” while working with those 5 planets in my 12th house.

    Looking forward to your house warming. All the best in house sharing. .

    • Shera,thanks!

      I appreciate the love, and certainly need the wishes for doing well with house sharing. It’s bringing up — well, it’s bringing up everything!


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