The power of affirmative thinking works a lot better without reservations or conditions
Makes it entirely different from kinda, sorta, conditional affirmative thinking
Even though I teach this stuff, and even though I understand it completely in theory, until just recently in this adventure of having to move and finding my new home I didn’t see the disconnect between what I know intellectually and how I was behaving. Which in moments of uncertainty (uh, which were pretty much all of my waking moments) found me behaving like an out-of-control ball of stress and fear. Pretty. Not.
- Fear and stress leaking out of my pores; I bet you could smell it; for sure you could see it.
- Fear and stress negatively impacting my work with my clients and my work on my business (distracted much?).
- Fear and stress compromising my health, which is no great shakes to begin with.
- Fear and stress affecting my looks (sleeplessness and nervous cuticle attacks make me so attractive!).
- Fear and stress being bigger than my peace and happiness (to the point of being convinced can’t be peaceful or happy).
Yo, that was all choice. I know!
I chose to do what I know how to choose, because of course. There’s some kind of comfort for me in my habitual dark side. Instead of operating from knowing knowing knowing that I’m being guided — fear and stress come way too easily to me. In the process of learning to be a spiritual, brave, of-service woman, I have shed lots of resistance (and clearly have many more layers to go). I learned how to affirm my prayers, to ask to be guided. But in the face of uncertainty, spiritual certainty drops away and I lose my grip on the good. Oh Fear! I know you, I know how to hang out with you. So I choose to ignore/forget any affirmation, which immediately causes me to drop my connection to the Divine, and instead I walk around fanning the flames of my negative scenario of the moment. I have plenty of them!
What was different this time
This time, I tried something new. In addition to saying and singing and painting and praying my affirmation daily, and more than once a day:
My perfect house at my perfect price at the perfect time is already chosen and ready for me now. All I need to do is keep walking in its direction.
In addition, I also started compassionately handling my fear and stress. It would still come in. Of course. But instead of freaking out (I’m not supposed to be fearful any more!), which only makes it bigger, or diving into that old dark and grimy neighborhood — the intersection of Stress and Fear — at the expense of everything (see those bullets above), I would welcome them, give them an imaginary little pat, thank them, and then gently move them out of the way so I could keep moving in the direction of my house.
From the time I started this combined method, it was less than 14 days until I was led to my new house and signed the lease. Just sayin’…
Which is awesome!
- It’s right on the Bay Trail in Point Richmond — as in 20 feet from my door. Which although connected, is a much cleaner and quieter Bay Trail than the one I walk 13 miles south in my current neighborhood. It’s gorgeous.
- The house has every feature on my wish list. Dishwasher. Washer/dryer. Gas stove. Wood (okay fake wood) floors).
- It’s nearly 1,800 square feet. Plenty of room for me and my housemate and room for privacy.
- It has vaulted ceilings so there’s plenty of light and air.
- It’s about $500 per month less than comparable rentals right now. A bargain!
There are some things I don’t like. It’s not perfect.
- The fake wood floors. But at least there’s no carpet.
- It’s a development. All the houses look alike. I can’t decorate the front at all.
- And there are what’s called HOA rules. Can’t do this. Can’t do that.
- It’s far away from much of my life, far enough up a too often traffic-choked freeway to make me have to get creative about back roads and scheduling.
- It’s not very diverse.
But hey, I could use the quiet and the beauty after 8.5 years of living in a very gritty edgy and unsafe neighborhood.
The lease was signed last night. I move in six weeks or (gulp!) less. The to-do list is already quite long and growing by the minute. I begin packing next week.
Now to come up with an affirmative prayer for this move!
Suggestions anyone? How have you done this big life change in a short timeframe and retained your sanity? Talk to me in the comments. Blessed be.