Your niche, your road — own what makes you unique

YourRoadI went to a tantra and breathwork workshop yesterday

And was told I wasn’t doing it right


I know the facilitator had nothing but my healing in mind when she told me to go deeper, and to reach for more. I’m not sure exactly what she had in mind a little later when she suggested that because I wasn’t having a deep and profound experience I was perhaps disassociating. 


I know from my own experience as a student of transformational technologies, and as a teacher, that not everyone has the same capacity — in any given moment — for a breakthrough. That everyone has her own pace, her own journey, and follows her own unique path. Which is often not linear nor predictable — a spiral that bends back upon itself and then goes forward and then bends again…. I also believe that techniques are not cookie cutters — not everyone is a good fit for everything.

In my own private practice, I find that every client is unique and that what tools and techniques work for one may not work for another, or maybe not in the same order, or maybe it will take longer for one to get the benefit than for another. Even in my group trainings, with a set curriculum, I make space for lots of individualization, as needed, because my clients are beautiful, quirky, unique individuals.

Stand for yourself as the beautiful unique individual you are

Whether you’re learning something, or teaching something, being a participant in a workshop, or leading your own class, be yourself. Your beautiful, human, self. As you are. The more you can do this, the more you can find, claim and rock your niche!

This workshop I attended offered me a powerful opportunity to realize and take ownership of something very useful…What you have, who you are, these are your unique gifts. Everything you have survived and transformed becomes the gifts you can offer to the people you serve.

There are many reasons to claim your niche for your business

  • On your journey, as you heal each and every single thing that has brought you to be the beautiful woman you are today — every wound, every trauma, every joy, every regret, every loss — those things begin to change and become transformed into your own unique gifts — into exactly what it is you are meant to share in your work.
  • Your gifts are not for everyone. I can’t hear this enough, and I can’t say it enough: I’m pretty sure you don’t need to appeal to seven billion people to succeed in your business. I am certain that the ones you are meant to serve — the ones who need you — will find you with so much more ease if you can let go of trying to appeal to the whole planet and talk directly to your tribe (the ones who crave what you’ve got, sister).
  • Resistance to claiming a niche comes from fear. I know this from experience. I used to say I was an intentional generalist. I finally realized that I was using that fancy phrase to cover the fear that if I didn’t take all the work that I could, all the work that was offered, I wouldn’t survive. I promise you, when you plant your flag, and start offering your gifts to your ideal client, you can move into your sovereignty in your business. And your tribe, your ideal clients, will learn so much from your discernment, from how you choose those with whom you work. They will learn, and they will have mad respect for you!

How are you going with claiming your niche? Is it easy? Is there any resistance, any stuckness? Share your experience in the comments!


I have so much gratitude!

  • I am grateful for how far I’ve come. I was able to immerse myself (at the level that works for me) in a new experience, and drink in some bliss, learn some new techniques, and meet some lovely people.
  • I am grateful for finding opportunities — and acting on them! — to be generous.
  • I am grateful I volunteered to pick my sister up at the airport last night. I so enjoy her company!
  • I am grateful for having completed the bookings for my journey. I am all set with places to rest my head for my big California road trip that starts in less than three weeks!
  • I am grateful for this crazy thing I’m doing; I’m taking a month off! For the second time in my life. I traveled to Europe (for the first time) in 2010, and now will be visiting Big Sur, Santa Barbara, Joshua Tree, Kernville (Sequoia National Park), Mammoth Lakes (Death Valley, Kings Canyon), South Lake Tahoe, and Sonora (Yosemite).

What gratitude do you have today? I’d love to hear from you in the comments. And, if you know of any amazing places along my path of my sacred journey, please jump in and let me know. I’m compiling an amazing list: Cambria, Integratron (an acoustically perfect dome in the desert), Devil’s Postpile, Bristlecone pines (the oldest trees in the world) in the white mountains, hot springs in Markleeville and Death Valley. Got any to add? FYI I’m driving a Camry, so off-roading is not on the agenda!

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I’m a barely tamed hippie, sage, seasoned, sarcastic (not all the time any more, but still). I’m a mom, a daughter, sister, a neighbor, and a friend. I’ve been on this meandering journey — like you, probably — seeking a better connection to and experience of peace, harmony, and fun in every bit of life. I’m single, quite good at it, and mostly love it. I’m here for the conversations I get to have with you, which these days center on exploring the mystery and beauty of life, work, health, aging, and creative expression. Want to know a little more about me and my journey? Explore the site. Read the blog. Connect with me on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Pinterest, and LinkedIn.

Join the conversation!

  1. Hi Sue !
    Cool you are going to check out Integratron ! I heard of it about a month ago when a friend learned I was heading out west. I did not get to experience it. Maybe you will !? !
    Next time can take more time and get to Josuha tree and Integratron. I enjoyed seeing some of our mutual friends in LA. Bon Voyage dear fellow traveler. Blessings on all aspects of your journey. Great to hear you taking a month to travel again. Inspiring. Enjoy (: Love, Eva

    • Eva, thanks for your comment. I’m getting so excited about my trip. It’s a lot of work though, to plan a long break. Wow.

      Much love to you!

  2. Diving into niching is definitely a journey not to be taken lightly. It’s like a ‘personal growth 202’ course for all the areas you describe having to look at. There’s a freedom though in knowing you don’t have to help everyone and can focus on connecting with those you can help the most.

    I so love your upcoming journey. Looking forward to hearing the ‘road reports’, whether during or after.

    • Lorraine, you bet there will be road reports. I’m thinking more pix than words, I’m a big picture taker. And of course I hope to take a break from writing as well as from working, and recharge as best I can.

      Thanks for taking the time to comment, so appreciated.

      Love and blessings,

  3. Hi Sue,

    I really enjoyed this post, and loved your observation that not claiming a niche comes from fear. This is something I’ve examined in myself as I’ve journeyed through this process, and I’m always observing that process with my clients, looking for ways to help them be more specific and claim their niches. So it’s helpful to hear this perspective–I can definitely relate!

    • Christina, thanks for your thoughtful comment. I find that fear underlies many resistances, including this one. I took another peek at your website; looks like you are connecting to and expressing your niche very freely and beautifully. Rock on, sister!

      Love and magic,

  4. Sounds awesome. I think it’s so important to respect where you are. I think sometimes, while with the best intentions, teachers want you to go deeper for them, so that they feel good in their jobs. As they say in yoga, you come to your mat differently every day. Thanks for the inspiration!

    • Teri, I love that… what a generous way to put it, coming to the mat as I am in any particular moment, in any given breath.

      Thanks for your comment!

      Love and light,

  5. Hi Sue!

    Such inspirational words! I’ve recently found myself on a particular curve of my own unique spiral that has brought up issues that have been long awaiting some love and attention! You are so right that every journey is different – it’s easy to fall into the danger of comparing your results to others and losing focus of your own path. Your piece is a wonderful reminder for us to stay true to who we are!

    Much love x

    • Emma, thanks so much for your loving words! In 12-step recovery I’ve heard it said “Don’t compare your insides with other people’s outsides”, a lesson I keep getting to learn over and over and over again!

      AFGO — another frickin’ growth opportunity. 🙂

      Love and blessings,

    • Stephanie, So glad you found it useful!

      May your deepening discernment serve you and your clients very well. I took a look at your website; you’ve made a very good start. I love the welcoming feel of the home page. Nice!

      Blessed be, Sue

  6. Thank you for the insights!

    It has taken me almost 6 years to let go of trying to serve everyone! In the last couple of months I have identified a couple of very specific niches that I connect with. I have noticed that it has resulted in my feeling less overwhelmed.

    • Deserie, So glad for your comment, thanks for sharing.

      Nice how the clarity results in less overwhelm, love this!

      Love and light,

  7. I’m so glad you said “everyone has her own pace, her own journey, and follows her own unique path”. So many coaches out there are trying to fit us into the same mold.

    I’m one of those who have gone against a lot of the advice out there, to do my own thing. It might take a bit longer, but it feels a lot better. My “niche” is female entrepreneurs who want creativity and intuition. I chose them because I like talking to them 🙂

    My own personal gratitude today, is directed at having a working public healthcare system, and modern medicine. Without it, I wouldn’t be able to run a business.

    • Linda, I’m grateful too for healthcare, and grateful that you are getting the care you need.

      Thanks for the comment, I appreciate your words. Keep doing your thing, sister!

      Love and magic,

  8. Sue, great post… So many great insights! You are so right that we each have our own journey. When we can release the need to compare ourselves/our business/our growth to that of others it allows us to step into our own power. and when we are authentic THAT’s when we can truly embody our brand!

    • Linda, exactly! I love the way you put it. Authentic embodiment…nice!

      Thanks for taking the time to comment.

      I appreciate you!

  9. I love the reality check: your gifts are not for everyone. Great point.

    I’m still stuck on the workshop instructor ‘needing’ you to have a certain, specific experience. in many years of conducing workshops I have a ‘general’ idea of what happens for ‘most’ people… and appreciate the feedback when my methods either don’t connect or someone gets something unexpected.

    • Andrea, welcome!

      Thanks for your message; I know that the facilitator had nothing but my best experience in mind when she spoke to me; I get that. And I also get a deep reinforcement of the idea that everyone has and deserves her own unique experience.

      Thanks for putting it so beautifully.

      Love and blessings,

  10. Sue, this was a fabulous post. I laughed at the beginning because of your response to the teacher! I love how you give permission for your clients and yourself to do “life” in a unique way. We are all unique, aren’t we!?!

    • Deanna, thank you. We are all unique, and I know that part of how I can best serve my tribe is to remember that. I want to meet you exactly where you’re at, yo.


      Grateful for you…

  11. Loved your post Sue. The fact that you stressed how important it is for us to accept our individuality. If we were all from the same mold what a boring place the world would be.

  12. Sue, I am becoming such a huge fan of yours. We have such a similar perspective on life and business. I loved your approach to niche! I just recorded an audio talking about fear being behind people’s refusal to pick a niche. I only want to work with those people who are a perfect match – them for me and me for them. I am called to serve at the highest level and I can’t do that well for everyone. Thanks for sharing your personal experience with the teacher, too, great illustration of being on the journey and so okay with where you are in the moment.

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